The Loud House Re-Write - Get the Message
The story starts off with Lincoln playing a VR game where you fight zombies with breakdancing. Lincoln: Take that, zombie! (twerks) Feel my twerk, you evil jerk! (killing zombies; does a pelvic thrust) HOO! (Lincoln continues to breakdance; he goes up the stairs and does more moves in the hallway where he then enters one particular room) Lori: Lincoln! (Lincoln takes his goggles off and realizes he's in Lori and Leni's bedroom. He notices Lori looking angry at him, and screams in fear) Lori: There's only one rule in this house: stay out of my bedroom! If I catch you in here again, I will literally turn you into a human pretzel! (on the phone) No, not you, Bobby. (giggles) One sec, okay? (Lori forcefully kicks Lincoln out of his room. He looks annoyed, then he goes back to playing his game, until he reaches the bathroom) Lincoln: (to the viewers) Zombies don't need to see this. (Lincoln takes the goggles off and puts them on the ground. Then, he hears a knock on the door) Lincoln: Occupied! (The knocking then turns into pounding. Lincoln gets annoyed, and goes to answer the door) Lori: (on the phone) Bobby, you'll never guess what Whitney said to me today. Lincoln: (rhetorically) That you don't respect a man's privacy?! Lori: (ignoring Lincoln and kicking him out) No, silly! Not even. She was all like... (Lincoln goes to his room and realizes something) Lincoln: Oh no! My gaming glasses! (Lincoln runs out of his room and runs down the hallway, until Lola and Lana spot him) Lana: Hey Lincoln! Lincoln: (turns around) Uhh, hey guys. What's up? Lola: No running down the hallway! Lana: (shushes Lola) Sorry Linc, me and Lola are just practicing being hall monitors at our school. Lincoln: Really? I had no idea. Lola: Yeah! And it's serious business! Lincoln: Just, try not to take it so seriously, okay? Lana: Don't worry Linc. Just try not to do anything to get yourself in trouble, okay? Lincoln: Gotcha. (Lincoln goes to the bathroom to find that his goggles are now broken) Lincoln: Someone stepped on my glasses! NOOOOOO!!! (Since Lori kicked him out when he left him in there, he automatically blames her and sees that she left in the family van) Lincoln: LORI! YOU DIRT BAG! (Lincoln stormed upstairs to his room, then he talked to Clyde on his walkie talkie about what happened) Lincoln: One minute I'm electric-sliding with the undead, and the next... (groans) IT'S ALL LORI'S FAULT! Clyde: I can't believe it! Lincoln: I know! She didn't even say sorry! Clyde: (lovestruck) No. I can't believe these were touched by Lori's beautiful tootsies... Lincoln: Snap out of it, Clyde! Lori's a monster! All she cares about is talking on her stupid phone! Well, I'm going to give her a call she'll never forget... Clyde: What are you gonna say? (Lincoln looks in his drawer and pulls out a sheet of paper) Lincoln: I have this sheet of paper I made a long time ago. It's called: Why 'blank' is the worst sister ever. I knew this would come in handy someday, I just didn't know which sister would be getting it. (writes Lori's name in the blank) But you, Lori Loud, have made my decision very easy. (Lincoln dials Lori's phone number on his duck phone. While Lincoln is waiting, Luna is jamming, and riffs to the last note of Lori's ringtone) Lincoln: (impatiently) Agh. Must be charging her phone. No worries. I'll just leave it on her voicemail. Voicemail: Hey, this is Lori. You know what to do. Lincoln: Hey, Lori. It's your dear brother, Lincoln. There's something I've been meaning to tell you. You are... (Lincoln suddenly goes into a blindingly raging rant about Lori; Luna comes into his room and rocks out to censor the harsh and foul message for any profanity it may contain, all the while Clyde hears this in despair as his dream girl is getting roasted Lincoln: AND THAT IS WHY YOU ARE THE WORST SISTER EVER!!! (hangs up, then goes back to his walkie talkie) What do you think, Clyde? (Clyde suddenly faints onto his bed) Lincoln: Clyde? (Lincoln hears a knock on his door, as Lori comes in) Lori: Hey Linc. (notices his broken goggles, then laughs nervously) Looks like you found it. (clears her throat) Listen, I wanted to say I'm sorry for breaking your goggles. (pulls out a new pair) So I went to the store to get you a new pair, just to make up for breaking yours by accident. Lincoln: (shocked) Wait, what? Lori: (hands him the goggles) Here, go have fun. (leaves the room) (After Lori left, Lincoln began to freak out) Lincoln: What have I done?! I called Lori a- (guitar riff) -when she's actually a- (harp string) I have to delete that message before she hears it! (Lincoln peeks out of his room and doesn't see Lori) Lincoln: Okay, I think the coast is clear. (Lincoln rushes into the room, and finds Lori's phone on her dresser. He rushes towards it, and tries to delete the message. However, he hears Lori coming out of the bathroom) Lincoln: Shoot! (Lincoln hides under her bed, as Lori comes into her room and grabs her phone) Lori: Ahh, fully charged. Time to check out my new messages! (Lori walks out of the room, while Lincoln begins to panic) Lincoln: No no no! (Lincoln runs out of her room and tries to run downstairs. Lana and Lola spot him) Lola: Hey! He's running! Lana: (stops Lola) Don't worry Lola. (smiles) He's not doing anything wrong. Lola: True. (Lincoln gets downstairs and finds out that he's too late and Lori is already listening to his hateful message) Message: Hey, Lori. It's your dear brother, Lincoln. Lincoln: Lori! (dives at her) NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! (hits the ground) Ugh! Message: There's something I've been meaning to tell you. You are... (Lincoln looks on in horror, but Lori deletes it before the rant can begin) Lori: Ugh! Delete! Lincoln, there are two rules in this house: stay out of my room, and never call my phone! My voicemail is full enough without useless messages from you! Lincoln: (sighs) I'm sorry Lori, you're right, I guess everything I do just annoys you. (Lori noticed how upset Lincoln was, and began to feel sorry for him) Lori: (sighs) No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I'm sorry for being rude to you today, and I'm sorry for breaking your goggles. I guess when you're so focused on your own boyfriend, you tend to act a bit bossy towards your siblings. Lincoln: (looks up) Lori, to be honest, that message was just me complaining to you about breaking my goggles. Lori: But, why didn't you just talk to me about it? Lincoln: I was worried you were gonna yell at me, and act like I can't be mature enough to handle this kind of stuff. Lori: Bro, you should never be afraid to just talk to me about it. I understand, you are just a kid after all, and they do tend to react to things like this. I should just accept you for who you are. (Lincoln was touched by his sister's kind remarks, that he hugged her) Lincoln: Thanks Lori. Lori: (smiles) Go on, go play your little game. (Lincoln smiles, then he goes upstairs to use the bathroom) Lincoln: (to the viewers) Next time I have a problem with one of my sisters, I'll just talk to them instead of leaving a message or writing a nasty letter. (pulls out his paper) And who knows, they might make you feel better despite how they behaved before. (Lincoln rips apart his letter, then he flushes down the toilet. A knock is heard on the door) Lincoln: Who is it? Lori: (from outside the bathroom) Hey Linc, it's Lori. Are you done in there? (Lincoln opens the door) Lincoln: (smiles) All yours Lori. (Lori pats Lincoln on the head, then she closes the door. Lincoln goes back into his room and begins to enjoy playing with his new goggles again) The End. Category:Episodes Category:Re-writes